How to Boost Your Self-Confidence

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A few years ago, I was so excited when I got the news that my training proposal had been accepted by a well-known NGO in Benin City, Nigeria. I had been working hard to build my career as a women's empowerment trainer, and this was a major breakthrough for me. I was scheduled to train a cohort of women at the end of the year, and I was looking forward to meeting them and sharing my knowledge with them.

A few days before the training, I was informed that the press would be there to cover the event. I was immediately filled with anxiety. I had never spoken to the press before, and I was afraid of saying the wrong thing. 

My fear got the best of me. I didn't show up to the training, and I lost the opportunity to grow personally and to enlarge my network.

I learned a valuable lesson after that day: self- confidence is a must have in your tool box of life. 

Why is self-confidence so crucial? Well, we all have aspirations and big ideas, but without self-confidence, we may never take the necessary steps to turn them into reality. Doubting your abilities, skills, and competencies can prevent you from realizing your dreams and ambitions. 

Here are a few things I did that has helped me take on big goals and will help you turn things around. 

Self-Determination

This is the very first step to boosting your self-confidence. You must first make up your mind. Your mind is a powerful compass that guides your life's direction. When you decide to be confident, you set yourself on the path to succeed at it.

Let me share a powerful example of self-determination. Diana Trujillo, a celebrated NASA Flight Director in the U.S, was once living in Colombia, facing a life marked by war and hardship. At the age of 17, she asked herself if her life could be more than the struggles she was enduring. With just $300 in her pocket, she made the bold decision to move to the United States. Diana worked various jobs to put herself through school, ultimately becoming a NASA Flight Director. Her inspiring journey illustrates the incredible potential within us when we become determined to take the steps to achieve our dreams.

Increasing Self-Awareness

Another crucial step is to increase your self-awareness. Understand your strengths, weaknesses, capabilities, skills, and preferences. This self-knowledge helps you make informed decisions and position yourself effectively. You are unique, and embracing that uniqueness is key to boosting your self-esteem and confidence.

The Pitfalls of Comparison

One of the main reasons people lack confidence is because they constantly compare themselves to others. It's essential to remember that no two individuals are the same. Each of us has a unique purpose and path in life. Comparing your success or achievements to someone else's can be counterproductive. Instead, focus on your own journey and embrace your distinct talents and abilities.

The Fear of Judgment

Fear of what others might say or think about your ideas can also erode your self-confidence. Many great ideas have been dismissed as "stupid" by naysayers, but you'll never know unless you put them into action. The path to success often involves failure and persistence. The key is to believe in yourself and your capacity to create something remarkable.

Harnessing Positive Self-Talk

Your internal conversations significantly impact your confidence. Avoid negative self-talk, as it can limit your beliefs and hinder your progress. Instead, cultivate positive self-narratives, even in challenging situations. Saying encouraging words to yourself can be a powerful motivator.

Seek Support From Those Who Believe in You

Having someone in your life whose words you trust can be invaluable. During moments of self-doubt, their encouragement can lift you up. For example, the past CEO of IBM , Virginia Rometty said that she was offered a promotion to senior vice president of IBM Global Business Services in 2002, but she was hesitant to accept it. She felt that she didn't have enough experience and that she wasn't qualified for the job.

Rometty talked to her husband, Mark, about her concerns. He told her that she was selling herself short and that she was more than capable of handling the job. He encouraged her to take the promotion, and she eventually did.

Rometty went on to have a very successful career at IBM. She was promoted to CEO in 2012, and she retired in 2020. She is the first woman to have led IBM.

The story of Rometty's self-doubt and her husband's encouragement is a reminder that we all have the potential to achieve great things. Sometimes, we just need someone to believe in us when we don't believe in ourselves.

Competence

Lastly, become competent in your chosen field. Continuously develop your skills and knowledge to increase your confidence. Competence breeds confidence, allowing you to tackle challenges with assurance.

Boosting your self-confidence confidence is within your grasp. By believing in yourself, increasing self-awareness, practicing positive self-talk, seeking support, exposing yourself to inspiring environments, and honing your competence, you can achieve your life and career goals.

Dear Woman, What You Have is a Big Deal